- この手が力を失ってでも.. ぼくは描いてみせる.. !!!

presentaboutmelinksquotespast

Introductory:

Hey there, welcome to my blog : ) To help a bit with navigation,
♥present: my blog entries
♥about me: pretty self explanatory.
♥links: links to other places where you can find me ^^;;
♥quotes: just some random quotes. (didnt know what to do with that area)
♥past: my archive.

THANK YOU AND ENJOY ;)

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Ohkay so yesterday LOl I was typing and then everything I typed.. some letters just wouldn't work or smth.. but on msn my typing was fine .. just blogspot : P anyways ! SO my report card I was pretty happy with ^__^ almost straight A's ... ;__; cept for PE which I got 72% on T.T .... I suck at PE LMFAO im so .. non athletic .. I try my best though >W< ..

I'm so excited ~ I am gunna start making cards for my friends ^^! I hope I will be able to make them in time : D They will be 3 days late for christmas cards ! LOL but OH WELL it'll be for both christmas and new years ^__^ HMHMHM I wonder what I can draw on these cards ! O: Something cute ? HMMM LOL so excited !

Hm. So I just need to get this out. I thought you were top-notch, I thought you were the best for me. However, now that I think of it.. were you ever really there for me? Do you even know how much I went through? No, because everytime I went through something you weren't there. Have you ever seen me cry? No, because you were never there to comfort me through the hard times. Do you know how much pain I have felt in the past year? No, you don't because you didn't even seem like you cared. "Are you okay?" "Yes of course I am! " When it was obviously a lie that I wasn't ohkay. You didn't even ask again to make sure. Even another friend of mine could tell, something was wrong. The only difference is that he made sure and got it out of me why I was acting differently and helped me through it. This however, I will remember forever. Remember that one time? That one time I told you about how much pain someone was causing me? After I told you about all the shit they were giving me you replied with "Oh, they aren't like that I know them." So you were saying I was lying? You were saying that EVERYTHING I told you about that day, everything I experienced from that person, all the pain they caused me, was a lie that I made up? I also remember that one time that was the worst of the days for me. So much was happening and I was so stressed to the point where I had a breakdown. You were right there and you didn't do anything. A friend of mine closed the door on you but really? A door was able to stop you, even though you could see clearly I was suffering? Also the day my grandpa passed away, I thought: "Oh I have him to talk to, I'll be fine after that. I won't feel as bad" You asked me, "Are you okay?" and after I said I don't know. You just left and didn't even do anything to help me feel better. You did help a few days after but by then, another friend has helped me feel better, not you.

I may sound like a bitch for saying all this on BLOGSPOT but hey, it's like my diary. Why can't I? I never used names, I never said anything too personal. Nothing that will give anything away. Sorry for those reading this and getting tired of my rants. I assure you this will most likely be the last rant for awhile now. Afterall, it seems he was the cause of most of my distress.

Although you did cause a shit load of pain, you made me really happy at times too. Which I thank you for. I apologize for how selfish and and blind I was, but wouldn't it be best if you brought this up earlier? If you did we would've been able to do something about it. Now it's too late.

I don't want things to be weird but I have to admit it will be hard to get back to normal.

"It really hurts when you expected so much more
from the person you once loved so much."

All I can say today.

On Sunday, December 19, 2010 at 4:23 PM

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